by Stacey | Aug 13, 2015 | Devotionals, reflections, and encouragement
He was lying, and she knew it, but she couldn’t prove it.
After 30 minutes of tears and denial we suspected she was right. But, he clung to his lie like a drowning man, misplaced hope in concrete shoes.
Fearful eyes flashed. Will he be exposed? And what will be the consequence for his dogmatic refusal to repent?
And they face off. Neither budging. Voices rising. Tears flowing.
I tug her aside to consider forgiveness. Undeserved, unmerited mercy gifted to him because she loves him. She can’t make him confess or apologize, but she can forgive him KNOWING he is wrong and unrepentant.
Her wet tears dampen my t-shirt as she considers the cost of letting go of her righteous anger. Forgiveness always comes at a cost.
“Mercy and forgiveness must be free and unmerited to the wrongdoer. If the wrongdoer has to do something to merit it, than it isn’t mercy, but forgiveness always comes at a cost to the one granting the forgiveness.”
~ Timothy Keller, The Prodigal God: Recovering the heart of the Christian faith.
Christ freely extends forgiveness, but it cost Him much. It wasn’t fair. It physically hurt, but he loved us too much to withhold it.
A shuddering cry. She wipes her cheeks. We pray for his repentance. Pray that God does the work we cannot force in the heart of the boy we love. And it is better this way because when God does it, it is done. It is real and it changes you.
And more than her way, she wants lasting change.
She faces his indignant stubbornness and freely extends what will cost her much.
His eyes widen.
A tiny smile turns up the corner of her lips. A hug is exchanged. One is set free. One is weighed down with conviction.
And the sun sets three times before he gathers the courage to fix what he broke. With a trembling frame, he stands before her. “I did it. I lied. It was wrong and I’m sorry. Next time I will be honest. Will you forgive me again?” A single tear marks his cheek. A lower lip quivers, the full weight of conviction heavy on his heart.
She smiles wider, tugs him in, fully restoring what sin had broken.
by Stacey | Aug 6, 2015 | Devotionals, reflections, and encouragement
We find by losing, receive by giving. The low are lifted high and the humble are exalted. Weakness is strength. We rule by serving, lead by following, live by dying. The first are last. The poor are the rich. The slaves are free. We are saint and sinner, flesh and soul, old and new.
God is one but three, fully God and fully man. He is far and near, beyond and within. He was born to perish. He surrendered for victory. He died to live.
His Word is written by God, penned by man, and made alive.
by Stacey | Jul 30, 2015 | Devotionals, reflections, and encouragement
Unbearable heat. Sparked anger. Flared tempers. Bickering over games, over toys, over every little thing that doesn’t go right. The longsuffering sigh of motherhood escapes as another insult is hurled between the children. I turn away.
How long, Lord? How long ‘till we feel some relief?
And it’s all normal, until it is not.
Eye’s wide. Tears formed. Arms failing. Horrifically quiet. Silently dying within arms reach.
I scream his name.
A deep finger scoop frees the airway and the most beautiful breath sounds fill the room. I pull him in. Skin against skin, cherishing the body heat that means he’s alive. “It’s okay now. I’ve got you. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Jesus.”
Cool tears bring relief and the embrace tightens, neither ready to let go. Neither ready to acknowledge how fast it all changes. Forced normalcy cannot stop the flood. What if I hadn’t turned back? What if the God who gives and takes away had called him home? What if—
—what if I simply give thanks? Thankful today is not that day. Not the day that requires that kind of strength. Thankful I can hold him a little bit longer.
And it dissipates.
Frustration. Anger. Heat. All ceasing to matter in the cool light of life.
Thank you, Jesus.
by Stacey | Jul 2, 2015 | Devotionals, reflections, and encouragement
You do not promise physical healing. You said, “this world will have troubles.”
You do not promise earthly treasures. You said, “store up treasures in heaven.”
You do not promise popularity or ease. You said, “take up your cross and follow me.”
And I have trouble. Need. A heavy cross to bear. Still, I sing my praises because this life, this faith, is not about easy. It’s about You.
My wise, infinite, sovereign, holy, all-knowing, faithful, loving, all-powerful, self-existent, self-sufficient, just, never-changing, merciful, eternal, good, gracious, omnipresent God. I have enough reason to praise You – to roll out of bed and press my face to the floor – because of who You are, not what I want You to do.
I am nothing. Dust. A sinful and broken woman whose only hope for any future hinges completely on the grace and mercy of You and the sacrifice Your Son made for me.
A correct understanding of You and Your incomparable glorious nature, and a correct understanding of me and my sinful corruptible heart, should humble me to make my heart right with You and desperately seek forgiveness and transformation. No matter the cost.
by Stacey | Jun 25, 2015 | Devotionals, reflections, and encouragement
How do you manage it all?
It’s been asked. Not that our life or schedule is out-of-control busy, but it’s a bit atypical.
Ministry demands, home schooling, relationships, writing deadlines, plus the normal daily housekeeping requirements. It equates to a busy, busy day. Week… Month… Life…
Yes, it can be overwhelming, but only if trouble is borrowed from tomorrow, or next week, or next month instead of focusing on this moment. Victory is in the present moment.
What will I choose? What will I prioritize? Will this glorify God? Larger battles are won or lost in individual moments. So managing well is not about finding a new way to dispense my time, or utilizing an efficient meal and cleaning schedule (although I do have a great one). Managing well is about surrendering each second to God and trusting that He will give me what I need to accomplish what He has planned. It’s about being okay with leaving some things I had planned undone to make room for God’s plans. It’s about understanding the absolutes God has placed upon my time.
My relationship with Him. Being a helpmate to Kevin. Taking care of my health. Raising our children.
It about putting off selfishness and putting on love. It’s putting off pride and putting on humility. It’s putting off impatience and putting on patience. It’s putting off complaining and putting on praise. It’s putting off temper and putting on control. It’s putting off criticism and putting on kindness. It’s putting off complacency and putting on zeal. It’s putting off laziness and putting on diligence. All to bring glory to God.
Life is so much more than I can handle. But praise God, it is never more than He can handle. Moment by moment, choose to put on the things of God.
All for His glory.
