by Stacey | Aug 4, 2011 | Devotionals, reflections, and encouragement
Last fall our small family of three grew to a family of five. The addition of two busy boys added volume, laundry, and crazy activity to our days while subtracting sleep and sanity.
For those that know Kaitlyn, (our sweet almost seven-year-old daughter,) you understand what a culture shock this was for us. Our quiet, orderly, predictable life hurled out of control for months as we all struggled to find our sea legs in this wavy transition.
I read books, one of my favorites being Wild Things, the Art of Nurturing Boys by Stephen James and David Thomas. I discovered that the crazy, energy filled, always curious and often-destructive children who stole my heart were normal. Adventurous toddlers explore their world with an intense need to touch, taste, or dismantle everything around them.
I’ve worked hard these past few months to adjust my expectations. I desire an orderly home and well-behaved children but I also want curious, brave, and energetic children. Yes, they need boundaries, but they also need a safe place to express aggression, curiosity, and determination. My stress level decreased as I learned to say things like, “It is not okay to hammer the light switch (chandelier, china plates, the glass pane in the door etc), but you can hammer and pound away at the tool bench downstairs,” rather than yelling, “Stop hammering!”
I’m finding I’ve become fairly flexible at home but I still struggle with expectations when we are out in public. When we were recently out to dinner, I spent the entire meal monitoring table manners like some kind of secret police. Jon, who shouts rather than speaks, was frequently corrected, and we redirected Nick to express his excitement without squeals and screams. The dinner went well but I felt tense and focused on them.
Then a patron from another table walked over and complimented us on our well-behaved children. Her words were like a salve to my soul. My shoulders relaxed and I looked at my wild things with blue ice cream dripping off their chin and spilled chocolate milk soaking into their shorts and staining the chair seat and carpet. They beamed with pride. Less than five minutes later, a young man came and said much the same about our wonderful children.
It felt like a great weight lifted. Until tonight, I never understood how much a few simple words could mean to a parent of busy pre-schoolers.
I’m still working with them on table manners but I’m also working on relaxing and letting them be boys. They are little boys with different needs and different urges and they constantly seek adventure. I may never fully understand what motivates my son to belch at the dinner table, randomly bark like a dog, or shout “poop” in the middle of a sentence, but I love him with my whole heart exactly the way he is.
by Stacey | Jul 27, 2011 | Devotionals, reflections, and encouragement
One wailing at the door. “Mama! Mama! Mama!” Each word emphasized with the pound of a tiny fist.
Two squawking in a tug-of-war.
The dog barking at the child barking.
The hamster runs, getting nowhere.
Deep Breaths
Love is patient
Love is patient when a child cries.
Love is kind in the battle.
Love keeps no record of wrong.
Oh, how these children keep me humble, reminding me to apply scripture to my life.
Love is patient.
The Embodiment of Love is patient with me, kind to me, forgiving me over and over.
Love is a gift. His gift.
by Stacey | Jul 10, 2011 | Devotionals, reflections, and encouragement
Four-year-old Jon slips out of his bed and paddles to the washroom. Entertaining vocal straining and groaning, complete with a soft cry of victory, float down the hall. I listen for the flush and instead hear wild sloshing.
As I leap from my chair, I imagine him elbow deep in the dirty water. But instead, he is using his superhero strength to plunge the toilet. With each thrust downward, water splashes on the vanity and his bare feet wiggle under water.
I shriek (yup, I shriek.) “What are you doing?”
“It won’t flush my poop so I ‘unging’ it.” He never takes his eyes off the toilet or breaks rhythm in his dance with the plunger. Finally, the toilet flushes. Jon looks up and grins. “You’re welcome Mom.”
Sigh. Jon is growing up.
Yikes.
Today I wrote in Jon’s journal to commemorate his 4th birthday. I want to express to this sensitive and loving boy my deep love for him that grows deeper by the day. As I wrote the words, “…I want so much more for you than simple words can express… my heart overflows with love, I can barely contain it…” It struck me how my words echoed God’s desire for each of us.
I believe God wants so much more for me, more than I could ever imagine or dare to dream. I believe that His heart just bursts with love when He rests his never-ending gaze upon me. He loves me – more than I can envision or understand.
I love the days I can sit back, uninterrupted, and read the book God wrote for me. He carefully penned the words that would convince me of His great love. As I spend time reading His Word and talking with Him I too, am growing up.
Our 4-year-old spiderman
by Stacey | Jul 4, 2011 | Devotionals, reflections, and encouragement
Sunday morning we began a sermon series that I am anxious to continue. We are working through the book of Habakkuk. (Yup, that’s right – Habakkuk.) Habakkuk is a small Old Testament book packed with content. The prophet questions God about the troubling events he witnesses in his world. God’s mysterious ways puzzle Habakkuk.
Sound familiar?
What I see around me often troubles me. Evil appears to be in the lead and going unpunished and God seems silent. Why do innocent people suffer from natural disasters and at the hands of evil?
“Just because God is silent doesn’t mean He is absent (Pastor Kevin).”
Kevin goes on to support his statement with scripture. God is working. I suggest if any of these questions resonate with you, click here to listen to the sermon on Habakkuk titled, “Why Doesn’t God Stop Bad Things From Happening?”
We only made it part way through the first chapter yesterday, but I read ahead. (Spoiler alert!) By the end of the book, Habakkuk is changed. He learns to wait and trust in God and that God’s justice is far beyond his comprehension. He learns to be content even though he doesn’t always understand.
That’s the kind of contentment I want in my life. Contentment that comes from knowing life is not about me and never has been, contentment that refuses to worry about the things I can’t control or understand. God’s purpose for the world will prevail and I choose to live by faith.
by Stacey | Jun 27, 2011 | Devotionals, reflections, and encouragement
I’m reading The Chronicles of the Kings by Lynn Austin and I highly recommend the five book series. In fact, you can currently download book one from Amazon at no charge.
Reading this fictional series based on 2 Chronicles has brought to the surface many questions and Austin offers solid food for thought. This is not Christianity-lite – this is meaty and deep, piercing the heart and forcing the reader to wrestle with God over the big questions.
Like why?
Why did so-and-so die? Why is so-and-so sick? Why is life changing? Why did God allow this tragedy?
There is nothing wrong with questions – God does not shrink from questions. But Austin encourages the reader to ask the right questions. She implies what God does with someone else is none of my business. Why He allows a tragedy to rock my neighbor’s world is between Him and my neighbor. It is not my place to question His actions in someone else’s life.
Austin writes: ask questions, but ask the right ones.
“What does God want to teach me through this suffering? Which of my faults, like pride or self-sufficiency or self-righteousness is He trying to purge from me? Ask which of His eternal qualities, like love compassion and forgiveness, He wants to burn in my heart. Yes, ask questions, ask why he gave you the talents He did, Ask Him what he wants you to do with your life (pg 197-198 from book four, Faith of my Fathers).”
This doesn’t mean everything revolves around me all the time. I think it means that some things are none of my business. I think it means I can and should pray for my friends as they walk through the valley, but God doesn’t have to answer my nosey questions about why He has allowed them to go there. He would rather I ask Him what He is teaching me while walking beside them.
Something to chew on…
